I have finally finished my first draft and am approaching being completely caught up on this assignment. I struggled with some adaptions of my outline and ended up entirely cutting out one section but I am relatively satisfied with my final product. It has some work left to do but it’s draft so that’s expected.
Audience Question: What are you anticipating the post-production process to be like, based on what you accomplished during the production phase?
Author Response
Explain, with some specificity, your thoughts and feelings about the following:
- Key information about your particular project that you would like anyone who peer reviews your draft to know
The first half has been edited once and the second half hasn’t. It’s also super behind schedule so if anyone happens to be reading this is would love any feedback you have on my project so far.
- Major issues or weaknesses in the “Rough Cut” that you’re already aware of (as well as anything you’d like to know from your editors about those weaknesses)
I’m not sure at this point how well I did acknowledging the counter argument. I had a section in the middle that I cut out that was solely dedicated to the counter argument but I thought it was a little redundant.
- Major virtues or strengths in the “Rough Cut” that you’re already aware of (as well as anything you’d like to know from your editors about those strengths)
I like my introduction. I was struggling with it some but I think I pulled the flow together much better than I had it originally. I’m not positive that it fits the genre of a standard college essay thought so I would love any feedback you have on that. I also like my engagement with the reader by using “you” but I’m also not sure how well that fits the standard college essay.
Hey Hannah! I left the majority of my peer review as comments on your draft in google docs! Sorry if that was annoying haha. But I wanted you to know that I think you sufficiently acknowledged the counterargument! and I agree that your intro was strong and intriguing. i focused on some language usage suggestions as i thought these would make all the difference in your argument. if you have any questions feel free to let me know!
ReplyDeleteHey Hannah!
ReplyDeleteSo I know you were worried about informal language and the use of I and you, and I wanted to tell you I think it's just fine. Yes it's an essay, but it's not your standard research report, it's an argument. To make an argument effective you have to relate to the readers which is really hard to do without using I or you. I did it in my essay. And I think your tone is good, it's relatable yet still just aloft enough. Also, I think your conclusion should sum up your views rather than leave the reader with information about their own genes. In general I think the paper should be more argumentative because at the moment it reads as more of a research paper than an argument. Sway it a little and you'll be in good shape!